CFD 1220 Lecture Notes - Lecture 12: Life Review, Family Therapy
10 Jan 2019
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Document Summary
Gotman (1999) noted 6 signs of problematic marital communication. Communication: harsh start up, got from 1 to 10 very fast, the four horseman of the apocalypse, criticism, attacking someone"s personality or character rather than specific behavior, usually with blame, begins with you . Roadblocks to communication: advising, getting the facts, competing, assessing others, distracting, letting you talk only for so long, gunny sacking, having stored negative thoughts. I hear you and act like i am listening but not responding: name calling, putting everyone in a category, placating, u want to be liked so i am always pleasant. Fair fighting rules: be alone, set time convenient, not hitting below the belt, don"t fight to win , stick to one topic, both must be willing to find solution. If the situation gets too difficult, then back off and agree to continue later.
