HDF 313 Study Guide - Midterm Guide: Derogation, Vasopressin, Psychological Abuse
23 May 2018
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Lecture Thursday 10/05
Companionate Love
• Fiedship loe
• Companionate Love – the affection and tenderness we feel for those with who lives are
deeply intertwined
• Based on deep sense of friendship
o Involves companionship and enjoyment of shared activities or interest
o Built on a foundation of admiration, trust and respect
▪ Ex: comes up in attraction – meaning someone who we trust and respect
▪ 6 months to 2 years
• Sex is less intense and plays a less central role for companionate lovers
• Women report higher levels of companionate love than men
• Neural and hormonal level
o activates the areas of the brain associated with caregiving
o tied to vasopressin and oxytocin
• What makes a marriage last?
o My spouse is my best friend – men are more likely to report this
▪ Men friendship decreases
o I like my spouse as a person
▪ People who are in long lasting romantic relationship are more likely to
talk about aspect of companionate love
Love Over Time
• Passionate love tends to decrease over time
o High parabola graph, but narrower
• Companionate love increases over time because it relies on intimacy process
o At least initially
o Big parabola graph, wider
o More recent data graph: compassionate love is higher than passionate love
• Both decline over the course of marriage
• Does not decline with age
Can we predict relationship longevity?
• We can predict
• Investment Model
Interdependence Theory
• Satisfaction – outcomes >/ comparison level = satisfaction
o outcomes is greater than or equal to comparison level (CL) = satisfaction
o Getting what, and more than, you expect
find more resources at oneclass.com
find more resources at oneclass.com
• Dependence – outcomes >/ comparison level for alternative = dependence
o outcomes greater than or equal to comparision level for alternative (Clatlt) =
dependence
o Degree to which one relies on a relationship for outcomes
o Can needs be fulfilled by other interactions?
• Satistfaction and dependence contributes on whether people stay or leave
• Outcomes – rewards vs cost
o Reward should be greater than cost
o Reality: 1 reward for every 2
o Cost: fighting, jealousy
Calculating Satisfaction
• How rewarding is your relationship?
• Dependent
o Comparison level for alternatives is lower than the outcomes (outcomes higher)
• Not dependent on partner
o Outcomes lower than comparison level for alternatives
• Satisfaction can only be measured on our own calibration
Goodness of Outcomes
• Relationship A
o Outcomes > Cl alternative (expected) > Cl
o Very satisfied, somewhat dependent
o Normal relationship
• Relationship B
o Outcomes > Cl (comparison level) > Cl alternative
o Very dependent, somewhat satisfied
• Relationship C
o Cl > outcomes > Cl alternative
o Involuntary dependence
o Ex: domestic abuse relationships, unhappy relationship, consequence of leaving
is worse than staying
• Relationship D
o Cl alternative > outcomes > Cl
o Unstable
o Ex: happy but could be happier, famous people relationship, having a lot of
possible alternatives
o Ex: Brad Pitt marriage was great, did a movie with Ang Jolie, having a lot of
options
Commitment
• The subjective experience of dependence
o Closeness
find more resources at oneclass.com
find more resources at oneclass.com
o Attachment
o Loyalty
o Obligation
o Intention to remain
o Long term orientation
• Investment Model 1980
o Satisfaction
▪ Cost vs Rewards = outcomes
▪ Expectancies CL
▪ Outcomes >/ CL
o Alternatives
▪ Other potential partners
▪ Specific or general
▪ No relationships
o Investments
▪ Irretrievable resources
▪ Children, house, money
• Ex: selling house to split money
• Ex: children – divide custody, loosing time
▪ Joint social networks
• Social networks and friendship divide
▪ Time, emotions
• Ex: memories, photos
Lecture Tuesday 10/10
Commitment and Consequences
• Commitment
o Sat, ALT, INV
o Stay /leave behavior
o Perspective taking
o Accommodation
▪ Ex: making the bed or not
o Derogation of alternatives
▪ Ex: be more likely to discount how attractive or successful they are
o Willingness to sacrifice
o Illusions and perceived relationship superiority
o Fidelity
▪ Less likely to cheat, highly committed
• How we think about our motives to remain in a relationship
o Ex: choosing a major or changed a major
▪ Derogation of alternatives
▪ Low satisfaction in previous major
find more resources at oneclass.com
find more resources at oneclass.com
Document Summary
Companionate love: (cid:862)f(cid:396)ie(cid:374)dship lo(cid:448)e(cid:863, companionate love the affection and tenderness we feel for those with who lives are deeply intertwined, based on deep sense of friendship. Can we predict relationship longevity: we can predict. Commitment: the subjective experience of dependence, closeness, attachment, loyalty, obligation. Investment model 1980: satisfaction, cost vs rewards = outcomes, expectancies cl, outcomes >/ cl, alternatives, other potential partners, specific or general, no relationships. Irretrievable resources: children, house, money, ex: selling house to split money, ex: children divide custody, loosing time. Joint social networks: social networks and friendship divide, time, emotions, ex: memories, photos. Commitment and consequences: commitment, sat, alt, inv, stay /leave behavior, perspective taking, accommodation, ex: making the bed or not, derogation of alternatives, ex: be more likely to discount how attractive or successful they are, willingness to sacrifice. Empathic accuracy: understanding the thoughts a(cid:374)d feeli(cid:374)gs of o(cid:374)e"s pa(cid:396)t(cid:374)e(cid:396, why is this important for our relationship, able to understand partner.
